This past weekend was one of progress for me. I was able to finally clear the air with a friend of mine, get things out in the open where they should be, so we can be on our way to a healthy relationship. It was exactly what I was hoping for.
Or was it?
Now that we've cleared the air, I have this feeling of...something. I can't decide if it's dread that now that the air is clear what I probably always knew is indeed true. Or hope that we didn't slam into a brick wall after all. Or this feeling of being totally out of control of things. I can't shake feeling unsettled, and I wonder if part of it relates to anxiety that's building for the weekend ahead. What if things go really poorly? What if things go really well? What if at the end of the weekend I end up back at square one. Alone. With my heart in my hands.
Hold on...I'm having an anxiety attack.
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