venting

This has been a trying day thusfar. So far I've wanted to kill about 3 people and quit my job twice. I don't know why I am so frustrated. I know I'm tired. Which is probably part of it. But I feel like I'm screaming at the top of my lungs and no one can even hear me. I just want to go home.

It's as simple as that. No more words necessary.

God's will

I'm revelling a little bit. Or reeling. Or both.

For some reason, I've been procrastinating about looking at opportunities to work in Charlotte. I don't know why. There would be some pretty good company there, if I chose to go. And the town seems nice.

So tonight, I did a couple of random searches. And what did I uncover almost immediately? The need for a WRITER at a non-profit, Christian organization. I know it isn't fate or coincidence that I would come across it, but why tonight? What is God trying to tell me about this place, the person, this timing.

I don't want to miss His voice. Pray I don't miss His voice.

Rebecca needs...

My friend Steph did this exercise on her blog. She googled her name and the word "needs" and posted the first 10 things that came up. So I followed her lead, and these are my needs (according toGoogle):

Rebecca needs enlightenment
(so that's why I've been feeling so in the dark recently! Can someone please enlighten me? Oprah, are you there?)

Rebecca needs support around her educational goals
(In what way, I'm not exactly sure. Money maybe?)

Rebecca needs to find out...
(Something, I just don't know what it is. So if I find out what I need to find out, I'll let you know.)

Rebecca needs a family that is structured and consistent
(I thought I had that...)

Rebecca needs your help today!
(Unbeknownst to me, I'm running for political office)

Rebecca needs just one good, meaty, dramatic role and the chances of her skyrocketing to fame will increase tenfold
(I'm so glad I got this tip! Question - does my current job count? It's certainly got it's dramatic days.)

Rebecca needs your help to remain this side of the sanity line
(possibly true...)

Rebecca needs to choose a database
(I'm afraid to ask of what.)

Rebecca needs to vent
(I'm glad that someone else realizes I have a lot on my mind.)

Rebecca needs acting
(Why be yourself when you can play someone else?)

So now I wonder what some other people in my life "need"?

nerves of nerf

My life is not exciting. Get up. Work. Work out. Watch TV. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.

So it's hard to come up with stuff to write here. The drama that was about a year of my life...not so much. It's resolved. And the steely resolve that situation gave me has started to wear off. So now my nerves of steel are squishy. Are they in need of exercise? Maybe. But nevertheless they are being tested.

Saturday (less than 2 days from now) I am meeting some pretty important people. They aren't professional athletes, actors, the George W.'s, or anyone famous to the world. But they're pretty important to someone who's pretty important to me.

I've been told not to stress about it or worry about it. And I know that I shouldn't. But it's important that I make a good impression. So until I meet them I'm going to stress and worry and hyperventilate. Then I'll be fine.

And the biggest obstacle I'll have to overcome is what to wear to work on Monday.